There are two inherent truths about college football's top 25 rankings. The first is that everyone reads them. The second is that everyone hates them.
The contempt is legitimate. Look at the numbers:
Teams ranked 20 through 25, over the past decade, are just 76-76 in matchups against unranked Power 5 foes that went on to finish the year with a winning record.
Last year, teams ranked 11th or worse at game time were just 14-15 against unranked (but above .500) Power 5 competition.
Teams that finished the year unranked in 2019 had a fairly solid 14-17 record against teams ranked 11th or worse at game time, too.
In all, 32 different teams held a ranking between 21 and 25 last year -- essentially one-quarter of all of FBS.
The point of all this is to say that the top 25 rankings are a sham, yet the entire idea is still so ingrained in our college football culture that, even if we hate it on a surface level, we can't help but bow to its ubiquitous power.
To quote the great Frank Costanza, there has to be a better way!
Indeed, there is: Tiers. No "1 through 25," but rather groups of teams on a similar level.
This isn't exactly scientific, either, of course. But it's a start. And, since we've all been locked away in our homes and forced to binge-watch way too much TV, we'll use a few of those shows as our guides.
Tier 1 (two teams): "The Wire" Seasons 1-4
Ohio State, Clemson
This level is reserved for the teams that look to be just about perfect -- historic success, star QB, established supporting cast, massive depths of talent.
Just like the first four seasons of "The Wire," you've got to really start nitpicking to find an obvious flaw. Sure, replacing Chase Young and Jeff Okudah could mean a small step back for the Buckeyes' defense, and losing Isaiah Simmons will require Brent Venables to get creative at Clemson, but nobody doubts the ability here. They're the gold standard.
Tier 1a (three teams): "The Wire" Season 5
Alabama, Georgia, Oklahoma
They're not perfect, but like with the final season of "The Wire," the pedigree is there, and most of the pieces necessary to create something magical remain in place. It's just a bit ... off. How does Alabama replace its superstar QB? Is Jamie Newman the answer to finding a more dynamic offense at Georgia? Can Oklahoma's defense finally do enough to get the Sooners over the top? The answers to all three might be yes -- but there's a bit less certainty here than for Clemson and Ohio State.
Tier 2 (five teams): Season 1 of "The Simpsons," "Parks & Rec" and "Breaking Bad"
LSU, Oregon, Penn State, Auburn, Florida
Most of the pieces are in place and there's obvious potential for greatness, but things just haven't quite coalesced yet. That's where these teams are, poised for something special if they can tweak a few wonky parts. Maybe a dominant O-line and a potentially explosive ground game takes a bit of the pressure off Myles Brennan at LSU, the same way "The Simpsons" pivoted from a Bart-focused Season 1 to Homer's everyman buffoonery in Season 2, and the whole thing will click into place perfectly.
Tier 3 (six teams): "Ozark," "24" and "The Walking Dead"
Washington, Notre Dame, Texas A&M, Michigan, Texas, Wisconsin
They're good. Lots of fun sequences. Nice casts. But boy, every few episodes, the plot goes off the rails and you can't help but think ... shouldn't this be better? That's our group of teams in Tier 3, full of possibilities but far too often ending up in a muddled mess. Maybe Sam Ehlinger puts the Longhorns on his back and turns Texas into something truly magical, or maybe he ends up fighting a mountain lion and coming down with an inconvenient case of amnesia. (Seriously, the first season of "24" had everything.)
Tier 4 (eight teams): "Stranger Things"
Iowa State, Boise State, Iowa, Memphis, UCF, Appalachian State, Baylor, Utah
If you've never seen an episode of "Stranger Things," here's the premise: A group of kids in small-town Indiana partner with a local sheriff and a scientifically engineered preteen with magic powers to fend off demons from an alternate universe. It's set in the '80s, there aren't any A-listers (unless you count Winona Ryder, which you should) and it stars a bunch of kids. It all sounds absurd, but much like Iowa and Baylor, it's much better than it sounds on paper once you get into it. Plus, if any of these teams actually made the playoff, we'd be fully immersed in college football's version of The Upside Down (an alternate parallel dimension on the show).
Tier 5 (10 teams): "Tiger King"
North Carolina, Pittsburgh, USC, Tennessee, Cal, Oklahoma State, Minnesota, Miami, Arizona State, Louisville
Nobody feels good about watching "Tiger King" exactly, but there's just enough substance there to be intriguing, and suddenly everyone you know is talking about it, and you don't want to be left out. That's what it feels like to be on the Tennessee or North Carolina or Oklahoma State bandwagons right about now. They've all got enough pieces that you can convince yourself there's a real opportunity here, but then suddenly everyone else is saying the same thing and all the buzz starts to become overwhelming and -- really, we're this excited over a team that lost to Georgia State last year?
Tier 6 (22 teams): "CSI," "Law & Order" and all the Chicago shows
Nebraska, Florida State, Indiana, Kentucky, Virginia Tech, Cincinnati, TCU, Ole Miss, Louisiana, BYU, Navy, Wake Forest, Buffalo, Air Force, Kansas State, Louisiana Tech, Michigan State, Mississippi State, Temple, Texas Tech, Washington State, West Virginia
These guys aren't anything special. Indeed, like the franchise TV shows, they're all about the same, rarely standing out in the crowd, but perfectly capable of keeping you entertained for a few hours. They're fine, and it's actually pretty important that we define who falls into that "just fine" category. As the playoff committee starts sifting through résumés, these are the teams that provide the bulk of the job history. They're not eye-popping elite wins, perhaps, but getting a few victories over the "just fine" teams says something about quality and consistency.
More importantly, this doesn't leave us in the middle of the top 25 trap, where a win over No. 23 means a whole lot and a win over the fourth team in "others receiving votes" means absolutely nothing. This group represents the lens through which we can determine just how good all the teams above them really are.