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Oh, the things you missed from Nick Kyrgios' first-round US Open match

NEW YORK -- We will save the debate over whether it's OK to start a match at 11 p.m. -- for players, fans, anyone. Luckily, after a long day of tennis Tuesday at the 2019 US Open, Nick Kyrgios was on good behavior -- for him -- and decided to put on a show en route to beating American Steve Johnson 6-3, 7-6, 6-4. Missed the match because you were either asleep in North America or pretending to work in Australia? Don't worry, we watched so you didn't have to. Here's what you missed:

A consistently blistering serve

The Kyrgios serve was in full swing in Armstrong Stadium, with the speed and accuracy way too good for Johnson. The Aussie sent down 24 aces, winning a massive 88% of points on his first serve, the fastest of which was clocked at 141 mph, second only to Reilly Opelka in the tournament so far. And he finished things off with a massive second serve, too.

It wasn't all calm, cool and collected

Just when things were seemingly going smoothly with Kyrgios up a set and the second frame tied 4-4, the Australian became unsettled by spectator movement in his sightline as he was about to serve. He argued with British chair umpire, James Keothavong, and received a code violation for swearing. (In Kyrgios' defense, there really were a lot of people moving around.)

The continued conversation

Not content to let matters lie, Kyrgios demanded to know why Keothavong wasn't doing more to control the crowd.

Kyrgios: "Why aren't you looking at them? That's your job."

Umpire: "I'm looking at you."

Kyrgios: "Why are you looking at me?"

Umpire: "Where else would I be looking?"

Kyrgios: "At the ball, in case you need to overrule or something, I don't know."

Johnson wasn't too happy with all of this, saying in clear earshot of the umpire: "Stop f---ing around and play tennis."

The dance

When you've sprinted to the net to chase down a drop shot and then played the most delicate of angles for a winner, you're entitled to a special celebration. And so Kyrgios pulled out a dance move that Kylie Minogue would have been proud of in 1988 when she brought back "The Loco-Motion." Someone get us a GIF of this -- stat!

The opponent

Do we think Johnson meant to steal his look from Mario? As in ... Super Mario? The red hat, the mustache -- we're just sayin'. All jokes and resemblances aside, the American tried numerous times to insert himself into the match, often becoming frustrated by Kyrgios' in-between-points banter and rallying yells from the Australian's guest section.