England winger Chloe Kelly has revealed her experiences at the start of the season were "mentally tough" and a "dark time" following a battle for playing time at Manchester City and felt "powerful" writing her statement to force a loan move to Arsenal.
It was a turbulent start to the 2024-25 season for the 27-year-old who was confined to the bench, making only one Women's Super League (WSL) start in six games and remaining as an unused sub in many crunch matches, including the Manchester Derby.
Kelly's transfer saga concluded after she posted a statement to try and force a move away from the club on the day before the January deadline and Arsenal signed her on a short-term loan until the end of the season, while offers from Manchester United and Brighton also came in.
"It has been tough mentally," Kelly told media on Friday. "It has been draining at times. But I think for me, I know I'm a professional and I know I hold myself to a high level, but I think as a human, it was a tough time for me and I'm ready to move forward now. It was still a dark time for me because I didn't know how my future looked."
Kelly's statement revealed that the situation in Manchester was affecting not only her football but her mental wellbeing, and she said on Friday that she "just wants to be happy again."
While her public statement was criticised in some quarters, Kelly added that she felt empowered by the decision and believes it is important for players to have a voice.
"I think for me I felt a sigh of relief after I shared my statement," she said. "I think it had been a long time coming, of course. But for me, I think, yeah, a relief and I really felt good in that moment."
"I felt powerful, as women we should. But I think the support that I received from that was incredible. For me it was a relief that I had spoken in how I needed to speak and whether my move got over the line or not I was grateful to be able to share my words.
"I think there's always a time and a place but I think it's important that we have a voice no matter the situation and there can be a lot of background noise sometimes, but for me, it was a statement where I felt like I expressed my emotions but doing it in the right way too.
"I think is really important to do that but I'm ready to move forward with it all now and I'm ready to learn here and to be happy again. I think it's really important that we as human beings can be happy, and I am definitely more happy now."
Kelly moved to Arsenal on deadline day but has been unable to feature for the club thus far as Renee Slegers' team have played against City twice with domestic rules stating she cannot play against her parent club. Kelly was also cup tied for the FA Cup game against London City Lionesses having already featured in the competition for City before her departure.
Sunday's North London derby against Tottenham Hotspur will be Kelly's first chance to feature in red and white. If she does, it will be 2815 days since she last played for the Gunners come Sunday, as she grew up as part of the club's youth academy and made her debut for the club in 2017, before joining Everton on a permanent deal in 2018 aged 20.
"It's amazing to be back," she added. "I feel very settled already. And it feels like yesterday I was here, so it was easy to settle in. I've already got a smile on my face and enjoying training and playing under a top manager in Renee [Slegers] and a great bunch of girls."
Kelly was dropped from the England set up in manager Sarina Wiegman's most recent squad for upcoming Nations League fixtures against Portugal and Spain, with Wiegman admitting that Kelly was not included in the squad due to her lack of playing time.
"Sarina's an amazing manager and who I respect so much and what she's done for English football," Kelly said.
"I enjoy working with [Wiegman] and I understand completely her decision and I'm ready to fight for my shirt back. I have high hopes for this next six months and I'm really excited now."
Kelly admitted that she relied on those around her for support during the difficult times.
"I think using people around you is really important, but also never getting too low with the lows, never too high with the highs. For me, in 2022 [following an anterior cruciate ligament injury], I was still not even training on the pitch with the team in this moment so I think the best is yet to come for me.
"When I'm at my best, to have a smile on my face. And I think it shows that football, sport, isn't always a journey that goes up. There's some bumps in the road throughout and throughout my injury, I was able to bounce back from that.
"I think this time round, hoping my bounce-back ability is strong again. So I think I'm a really resilient person and character, so I'm ready for the fight again and I'm ready to show what I'm capable of again and being at my best.
"I'm excited for the future. And wearing this badge with pride is what I'll do. And I'm excited to play in front of our amazing fans at the North London Derby now."