Should 2025-26 go the way of some of the worst Ashes tours, this interlude will be a hearty stick to beat them with. It may already be one now, at 2-0 down and with three to play. But on Wednesday, an England squad - very much still together - embarked upon their first mandatory session of this trip.
It was a bumper game of PIG - a football-based keepy-uppy game, played in a big circle, with three strikes for each participant - on Noosa Heads Main Beach. The session was observed by plenty of other beach-goers, with this being the start of Australia's summer holiday. Naturally two paparazzi photographers were in tow, and a few journalists.
Local radio hosts "Archie and Bretz" from Sunshine Coast-based radio station MixFM took the opportunity for some Chris Moyles-era Radio One *banter*, donning full whites and holding placards reading "FOR SALE: MORAL VICTORIES" and "BAZBALLERS ANONYMOUS, FREE COUNSELLING". England captain Ben Stokes, having clocked them on the way, saw the funny side and indulged them in an impromptu photoshoot. The team then enjoyed a fish-and-chip lunch at local jaunt Mahi Mahi before dispersing into their own plans.
Stokes and his players have spent plenty of time indulging selfies while at the beach or walking Hastings Street, the main strip of this idyllic beach town. They stick out from the crowd, for various reasons. Stokes, the most recognnisable, is also signposted with a vast Lion pride tattoo across his back. Many of the squad have also been sporting recently purchased Akubra hats that Crocodile Dundee, among others, has made famous in these parts. "They have been good sports about it," said one local reporter. "They were always going to cop it, but they have been understanding."
That England have chosen Noosa for their three-day break between the end of the second Test at The Gabba and the third, which begins at Adelaide Oval on December 17, is not an accident. Given the gap between the scheduled days of play, and ahead of travelling to Adelaide on Saturday for a first training session on Sunday, there was free time to be put to good use. And given it is only an hour-and-forty minute drive up from the centre of Brisbane, few visitors would wilfully avoid this paradise.
Hey Stephan we're Archie & Bretz from 92.7 MixFM on the Sunshine Coast. Here's the pic we got with Stokesy! pic.twitter.com/6a9s0YRw0O
— Archie Arenson (@ArchieArenson) December 10, 2025
Looking out into the vast, perfect blue emptiness of the South Pacific Ocean, Noosa is as good as it gets for a bit of "R and R". If ever you were looking for a spot to replenish your physical and emotional reserves, this is it.
Quite whether it has the cleansing powers required to overturn a 2-0 deficit remains to be seen. But Alex Carey was not simply toeing the line when the Australian keeper suggested that England would be nourished by their break, which Cricket Australia helped organise. Australia do the same whenever they come to the UK. A number of them even arrived early for this year's World Test Championship Final at Lord's to take in mainland Europe. Carey himself had a jaunt to Paris with his family. Cricketers know the value of getting away from the game better than anyone.
Nevertheless, the local papers have been in overdrive, laying into England for their venture north during a series going south. "Having A Bazball In Noosa" and "Life's a beach, even for the sinking Poms" are two of many headlines already, with some wry anticipation at what Thursday's papers might bring after their three-line-whip kick-about.
Given the scoreline, it's hardly surprising if England fans - looking on from afar - are irked by what they see as a jolly. To many, this is cocktails on the Titanic. More ice in that Aperol Spritz, sir? There's plenty to go around.
Many in the UK - punters, pundits, ex-players - had reservations about the lack of adequate warm-up ahead of the series, with a three-day tussle with the England Lions at Lilac Hill followed by a two-day loss in the first Test on a vastly different Optus Stadium surface. That ill-feeling was multiplied following head coach Brendon McCullum's comments that the team had "over-prepared" for the second Test, which they also lost by eight wickets. The five training sessions, he felt, left them without the required energy to hang with Australia in a day-night scrap.
That sentiment, beyond protecting his players, arguably felt like a counter-reaction to the criticism England received for not sending players to the Prime Minister's XI pink-ball match in Canberra. While that match was contested by the England Lions - plus Jacob Bethell, Matthew Potts and Josh Tongue - the rest of the Ashes squad took part in an unscheduled training session at Allan Border field on Saturday. All of which has made following through whole-heartedly with this Noosa trip a point of principle and pride.
There is another side to all this - the 2021-22 Ashes. Not just that Bazball was forged from the embers of that tour and England team, but that the likes of Stokes, McCullum and even Joe Root made a point of how this tour would be different. Shackled by harsh Covid-19 lockdowns four years ago, this trip was going to make up for the fear and anxiety that lurked off the pitch during those chastening months. The cricket, by proxy, would surely be better.
"It is a great place to go and play cricket and have the pleasure of visiting," Root said in October, having been worn down more than most in 2021-22. "We should absolutely go and explore it, and see all of the great things that come with being an international cricketer and playing in that country."
True to his words, they are. Sadly, the results are trending the same - and potentially worse. The urn was spurned within 12 days of play on the last Ashes tour. Now, England are already two-down inside six.
Since arriving on Tuesday, the vibe among the group remains broadly optimistic. Stokes' "weak men" statement seems, at this juncture, to have been taken as intended. But only victory in Adelaide will vindicate that and, of course, this particular side-trip.
They are here in Noosa for one more full day, with golf on the agenda on Thursday for those who play. The rest can make merry as they see fit before locking back in to turn matters around on the field.
The interesting aspect to this trip, much like Perth's spare days, is the presence of England fans looking to kill time between games, or just enjoy some sun before heading back to the UK for Christmas. Plenty more are coming the other way.
Many have nodded politely and encouraged the players they have bumped into. One particular punter late on Wednesday afternoon, having seen a group of England players sitting around supping their drinks, took it upon himself to take a freshly vacated seat and offer his two cents to an increasing awkward audience. A reminder that even in this beach paradise, rightly or wrongly, England are contending with disapproval home and away.